ive spent most of this morning going through past conversations in my head and old emails, trying to establish whether i believe in myself, or whether my ego is acting independently of my own knowledge.
have i been valuable? have i been honest? have i been respectful? am i truly in the right? am i selfish? am i worthy? am i an asshole?
maybe this is an exercise of becoming more enlightened. questioning the questions i ask myself. for me to be truly aware, dont i continually have to ask myself these questions? if i stop asking, will i be stagnant? will i not find growth? will i start to believe that these questions define me, or that these self doubts have power?
i hope to one day be able to acknowledge: i am valuable. i am honest. i am respectful. i am right. i am unselfish. i am worthy. i am not an asshole.
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